Giving Birth in Cyber Space
So this happened:
I got recognized. And I am not posting this to boast (although my ego is slamming on my insides, screaming "WTF??") but really I just have to acknowledge how bizarre cyber space is.
OK let me put it this way:
Creating a YouTube channel is a lot like having a kid
- This beautiful seed gets planted and begins to blossom
- You get insanely excited about it
- You do everything in your power to help it grow
- When you're ready, you expose it to the world and feel petrified that the world will chew it up and spit it out
- You research your ass off to feed it the right foods, expose it to the right people, and hope it falls in with the right crowd.
- You dump all of your time and resources into ensuring its success
- You feel overwhelmed with pride when it is honored or receives any accolades
- But then you think... where do we go from here?
How do I keep this baby on the right track? How do I know which is the right path when the options seem endless? But most importantly... how do I not make this about my stupid ego??
I guess part of my answer is right here in front of you. Being transparent is something I have always admired about other people's stories. So that's what I'm going for here. Whenever I get a compliment on my channel or a nice comment on my FB page - or a mention like this one! - I want so badly to take all the credit and let my head swell like a twisted knee. But I believe in my heart that it's not about me. It's about so many things all coming together at the right place and the right time. YouTube and I met and fell in love. This is when I was supposed to cyber-birth this creature. This is my baby and she's doing a fantastic job. I am very proud of how my channel is learning and growing and communicating. I really hope she doesn't start dating soon but I feel it coming and just pray that she meets the right channel.
More than anything, though, I hope she has endurance. I hope that years from now she is still learning and growing because that is what it's all about. The second she thinks she has it all figured out is the second she will downward spiral. So this is my job. To keep her on the right path, guide her when she needs guidance, push her when she needs pushing, and let her rest when she needs a break.
I am the proud mom right now, sitting on the sidelines with tears of joy welling up inside of me. But this is here and now. Tomorrow is another day. I hope she keeps thriving. I hope she touches people's lives for the better.
And I hope I she takes care of me when I'm old.